Brian Lerner

Tips to Success in Life

Tip #2 - Never Commit To Anything Early

Never commit to anything too soon except committing to not committing to anything too soon. This little gem of advice is a double win.

First, when you do not say “yes” right away you leave open the possibility to do something much, much better. Once you say yes and lock in that commitment you instantly close the door on so many of life’s incredible possibilities, like a 3am run to Tijuana for a chimichanga and some Viagra. (Note to self; never go back to Tijuana) For instance, it’s the holiday season. You’ve been invited to a party by a co-worker. On the surface it sounds like a fine party, but really, how can you know? You can’t. If you say yes right away you risk losing out on that other much more amazing party you get invited to last minute by your single friend who always, always gets you laid. Now what? You can’t possibly turn around and say no to the co-worker. You have to see them everyday and they will never get over it hence making work even more miserable than it is everyday already. You’re screwed. End of story.

Second, pretending you are too busy, have lots of options or simply are too good for people trying to hang out with you makes them want you even more. This kind of power is invaluable. Embrace. Use it to get things. (more on this in Tip #7 - Take advantage of people before they take advantage of you)

Always hold out for number one or you just might end up stepping in number two.  

Tips to Success in Life

Tip #1 - Be a douche bag some of the time

Look around you. Notice something? If you are looking in the right places you’ll see that some very successful people whether it is in business, in the arts or in having the hottest boyfriend/girlfriend you’ve ever seen all have something in common. Maybe not all of the time, but definitely some of the time these people are douche bags.

It’s a strange thing about humanity and the rules of attraction. Being too nice, despite it making complete rational sense, is a big turn off. Our subconscious and conscious battling it out once again. Although we know we shouldn’t like it when someone treats us poorly, our subconscious is drawn to that person. Being a douche bag in business leads to more power and influence over others around you. In love, being a douche plays into an underlying need for us all to be accepted. It makes no fucking sense at all, but don’t blame me; blame DNA. This insanity is indeed hardwired into our genes. Go ahead, try and fight it. You can’t. Give up.

What you can do is accept it and adapt. If you’re too nice, figure out those moments when there is an opportunity to not be nice and give it a shot. Learn something from George Costanza and do the opposite of what you would normally do. Do this enough times and the results will follow. You’ll soon find that you are relied on more at work, getting praised for that shitty painting of a Maple tree and banging hotties in dirty places like a bathroom stall at Newark airport.  

If you really want to get ahead in life first you must get under people’s skin. 

Tips for Success in the Entertainment Industry

Tip #8 - Have superficial relationships

Creating strong bonds with other human beings although essential to a healthy and happy long life will actually prove to be a huge obstacle when you need to climb over them on your way to fame and power.

The rationale here is simple. The weaker the emotional connection to other human beings the easier it is to leave them behind, take advantage of them, deceive them for personal gain and completely erase them from ones memory once you reach the pinnacle of your aspirations.

People not as ambitious as you will do nothing more than hold you back and those as ambitious as you will do nothing more than create additional competition during your journey. Keep both of these types of people in check emotionally and you’ll have no problem dusting them under the rug when the time comes. And let’s face it, once you’re a huge success you’ll have access to better looking, more important people. Save your energy for them.

Since You Didn’t Ask - My Thoughts on the Streamy’s

My disclaimer first. I actually had a decent time at the show and a great time at the after-party. So, thanks to all the Tubefilter people, some of which I consider friends, for putting it together. This is not an easy undertaking and the amount of work put into the night was evident. 

My breakdown of the night in smallish portions:

Vulgarity? I can handle it, even appreciate it when its smart and not gratuitous, but for a mainstream crowd it went too far. Some of this was spontaneous, but a lot of it was premeditated. 

Technical difficulties? It happens. Shouldn’t have happened as much as it did but, this is something that can be fixed. I have no idea what kind of preparation went into the show, but with some triple checking and a B plan things can go a lot smoother. 

Streakers and those desperate for attention at the expense of other’s poignant moments? Um, maybe some security is needed sadly enough. A little pepper spray perhaps? Or maybe the “kids” should just get their own show where they can battle it out to win the “most obnoxious in group settings” award and let the rest of us have a good time. 

Content? How about ending the self-deprecation and treating online video with the respect we’re expecting everyone else too. If we’re not taking ourselves seriously will anyone else? 

Format? People love to say that web video is unique. It’s not TV. It’s not movies. Some of the best shows wouldn’t work in any other format than the one it was created for. So, why is the awards show for this unique form of entertainment trying so hard to resemble every other awards show we’ve ever seen? The Independent Spirit awards sets up a tent in a parking lot for God’s sake. People get to sit at tables, drink, talk and have fun. Or is the fun all CGI? Anyway, I just feel if web video is going to remain a place for unique and innovative expression and not just the minor leagues of TV and movies then the celebration of it should represent it in a way that feels more in line with the people and spirit behind it.  

Hollywood and Web Unite? Not really. Feels more like the familiar faces came to do us all a favor rather than trying to lift up the community. There are exceptions, but it’s still them and us. Don’t get me wrong. I like Hollywood. I moved to LA from NY to be a part of that world and still strive to, but there was a feeling of condescension last night and that bothers me when I have so many close friends in the mix and consider myself more a part of the Web than Hollywood at the moment. 

Am I that old already? I ask this because I find myself wanting to teach the younger generation where this all started. Like a parent explaining to their kids how The Beatles started everything, I feel like the Streamy’s needs to pay some homage to a handful of influencers and innovators. Especially, when I’m watching more than one vlog that completely rips its format off the great Ze Frank. Do they realize this? Do they care? They need to.  

And lastly, and more personal, I was really fucking ticked off with the line to get in situation. Took forever. I was told by two different people the paper ticket I had in my hand was all I needed only to find out at the entrance I had to wait on another line for a real ticket to get in. All of this equaled my night starting off with incredible agitation. Maybe I’m not deserving of a red carpet, VIP experience just yet, but none of us should feel like such cattle being herded around.  

Oh and I almost forgot. Yada, yada, yada and blah, blah, blah…